Being Colored Is Not For the Faint of Heart

Being colored is not for the faint of heart.
It is a battle internal daily, wanting to pray, but doubting if prayer to a man primarily projected as white who happened to die for my sins on Friday conflicts with my knowledge of men and women subjected to things worse than death daily. History makes me crazy the way it conveniently ignores what is fact as opposed to what is factually pleasing. At some point people with similar tones of my darkly complected skin were traded in for the profit of insanity, inhumanity at its worst, still legal at its best even now. Subtle and technically termed under cover of policy, education systems that only look at the lives lived in chains. We know the names of few men, who marched and preached, though I ‘m certain black history goes beyond Dr. King. Don’t suggest that I limit my speech, I exert one of the few freedoms that I have as a human being and that freedom is to express not for your own happiness, but for the fact that I want to know who I am beyond a socially constructed title and still some part of me remains idle for the sake of the part of me not ready for this battle, even though I’m in the war with each day that I use ‘proper English, succeed, and even exist. Yes we’re all aware that as a nation, this is a story of that past. If that is the case, then answer me this, why are you uncomfortable now?